So we wake up full of energy and promise. I order my breakfast and coffee and wait patiently for it to arrive which it did 5 minutes before we had to leave. The coffee arrived 3 minutes later and I burned my tongue trying to get my moneys worth.
We jumped in the bus to see our tour guide is a 95 year old wheezing man. He and the driver looked like twins.
So Hannah whispers to me "Do you think the driver can even see properly?"
I shrugged, "They wouldn’t give a license to just anyone would they?"
We stop and think a bit before shuddering, "Insurance man", Hannah tells me so I feel a little more comfortable.
The driver then put some music on, looks back at the rest of us in the mini bus, "Rock, rock, rock the bus" and tried to get us to see if we could tip the bus by rocking it side to side together and cackling with glee. I knew we were on to a winner instantly. "Who cares if he can even see."
Ariane didn’t seem to be quite as comfortable about it all as Hannah and I. 10 minutes in after much dancing, clapping, swerving wildly to the music/could see properly, he calls for some silence and Colin would have been pleased to know he pointed out exactly where the school of life is located. Unfortunately it also seems to be where a Turkish prison is located. Not sure I would to go there personally. Ariane then asked if maybe the crazy drunk chainsaw man we met in Scotland went there as well.
Our first point of call was a small underground city. Not knowing what to expect we just casually strolled up.
"Oh by the way everyone, if anyone is afraid of enclosed spaces you may want to wait outside."
Ariane stopped a second, "Ummm,…"
"You'll be right", we assured her while dragging a clearly uncomfortable Ariane into the cave mouth.
"Guy's umm not really…" she stopped talking then and just followed really closely. "Ariane look how dark it is, what if the lights went out?"
"Ohhh, that would be so cool." Hannah and I say giggling with glee, "We could play hide and seek!"
"You'd never be able to find me"
"I doubt you could even find your way out of this maze."
This didn’t seem to help Ariane at all as she seemed quite terrified during the whole thing for some reason. Seriously though it was quite brave of her and Hannah and I were so proud of her and she never said a word and carried our stuff silently. It was the best place I have ever been to and totally amazing because it could hold 2000 people and people just dug it out 4000 years ago. The air was also crystal clear and fresh. It was from top to bottom 140m high. Absolutely amazing and it was only found 50 years ago. It is also said there are about 300 cities the same and people just find them all the time and there are heaps more unfound or just they don’t tell anyone. I would believe it because there are literally thousands of man made caves everywhere you look and no-one would go to them or even notice if the entrance was covered.
"I was the first guide here you know" our guide stated proudly, no one doubted him. "Do you know it was sealed for 2000 years and no one even knew it was here."
"DO you think maybe they left some monkey's in there before they sealed it and they evolved into a super monkey race?", I asked Hannah hopefully.
After the crushing answer we moved onto our next point of call a monastery in a gorge that was cool. From a distance it looked like a plain but when you got there, there was a deep gorge 140m tall and in the walls were the standard man made caves.
"No Mika no super monkeys here either", Hannah harshly pointed out as I looked at her.
We had lunch and my 'chicken' tasted like the fish Hannah was eating.
We next went to another hill with caves and churches which were carved into the hill and it was where the Christians hid from the Roman Empire. Hannah gave her last film to Ariane just before we arrived and then was instantly wishing she hadn't because it was really quite impressive.
"The sky is so beautiful", she kept crying.
"Ummm, don’t you see these amazing rock carved churches?" I replied helpfully but the sky was just amazing her too much to notice.
We got back into the van with the usual breaking, swerving to music, clapping, rocking before we arriving at a pottery place and then onto some fairy chimneys.
"Did you notice we didn’t have any music on but he was still swerving to what I presume was a song in his head."
"Some people just have natural rhythm I guess."
We arrived home and Frank and I wanted to go out and party so we played some pool. Danced a bit and there was a pretty girl there getting so much attention and she was lapping it up going from boy to boy so I swaggered on over to her.
"I know what you are up to." I began.
"What?"
"I know what your up to." I replied obviously.
"What am I up to?"
"You cant fool me. I know your game."
"What game?"
"You know"
"Excuse me what am I up to? I have no 'game'".
I suddenly started to look afraid.
"Its beginning, You started it!", I cried as I ran screaming from her.
I sat in the corner and giggled a bit, laughing at how humorous I can be sometimes.
"What's beginning?" she said when she had found me again.
"No, no stop doing it!" I screamed.
"Wait! Come back, what am I up to?" she said to the retreating me. Whenever she came near me for the next few attempts I would do the Catholic cross of protection. She then sat down for 10 minutes looking rather confused before coming to find me again.
"Don’t come near me, you'll do it to me as well!"
She then threw her hands up in frustration and left after I had then ran away waving my hands over my head as if to brush away the invisible bees, "Get away from me satan spawns." Maybe a bit much but I was getting carried away with my own cleverness and creativity. You see sometimes pretty girls need a reality check so I had decided to give her one.
It was 3am when Frank and I returned to our slumbering friends. I decided to tip toe in to avoid waking them so I took massive steps yelling "Tip, Toe" for each successive stops.
I wondered why they were awake so I asked them, "I was being so stealth, here look.", before I did it for them again for good measure so they could all see the whole thing. It was real lucky I did it for someone had sabotaged the door.
"Someone has sabotaged the door!" I cried, "lucky I came back and checked it, I bet they didn’t hear me sneaking about and I almost surprised the sabotagee's. Don't worry girls, " I said after a bit of careful work (in the dark), "I fixed it!" I said triumphantly. "I think they (they being the sabotagers) didn’t have the time to do a proper job of breaking the door."
Hannah and Ariane seemed on the point of pointing out to me that no one had touched the door since I had left it about 15 seconds before coming in and it had been fine before then. I then regaled everyone with stories for an hour before finally going to sleep, at 4am.